Wednesday, November 16, 2011

Year in Review

I find myself in need of moments to refresh and recharge more and more these days. Perhaps it could be that I am an over-analyzer or simply because I have become a professional juggler, trying to handle so many different things in my life at the same time. I admit, nothing has really changed in my life. Yet, it simply satisfies my sweet tooth to make sure that my days are coupled with unique designs and electric movements.

This year has been a really tough one.  I have experienced a layoff, bounced back on the right foot, found placement and have also been continuing my education while I also sing. No one told me that life would be easy except me thinking that I was superwoman and could handle “the fury of the storm as does the willow tree” (James Weldon Johnson).

But besides the things that have happened to me directly, we lost Heavy D who from a distance, practically grew up in the homes of all Americans and abroad. Even though it was on television I would see him, he was always there in his songs, like a cousin who would come by to bring joy to my day. I'll never forget Video Music Box with it's fly videos that used to stream across the scream. Those were some wonderful days.

I used to make it a priority to watch Andy Rooney with his witty self on Sundays and all of a sudden, the inspiring journalist has found a place in heaven.  We have had a major hurricane here in New York and also a snow storm that knocked out power all over. The news seems to have more and more awful stories featured in it everyday which kills the spirit to know awful things happen new and fresh daily; right in our own neighborhoods at that. This world can be a lot to absorb at times.

While my life is a developing story, I have realized some truths about myself. I am my own worst enemy. I have found reasons to doubt in all aspects of my life.  I was trying to pinpoint the very reason and for years found trouble with forgiving myself, even though I had physically moved on with my life, progressively.  Yet, my thoughts seem to retrace their steps back to the past where all things began.  That coupled with trying to survive a turbulent semester has really put a strain on me.

For one, who thought that English was an easy subject to study?  While this question is somewhat rhetorical, it also made me realize how much writing I have not been doing.  Last night, I attended a book signing event featuring Randall Robinson. He recently wrote a book entitled Makeda, and came to talk about it at Medgar Evers College.  And so, with all the desire I had in me to receive some guidance from the author and activists,  I asked him for advice to a young writer. “If you write then love to write but be prepared for failure.” He said, “But keep doing it until the day comes because it will come. If you love to write, write.” 

And so, here we are again, on the blank pages of a document, writing away.  I have been writing for school but have neglected to include myself in writing elsewhere; even in songwriting though I am still head over heels in love with singing.  I am learning to trust God boldly and have decided to join forces with the sun. They say home is in the heart and there is nothing like being in the place where love puts you. Love has put me on a writing frenzy and I feel wonderful and blessed.  And my inspiration came from someone who I hardly even heard about except through the words of a wisdomatic pedagogue.  

If you get the time, you should read Makeda.  Just from Robinson's storytelling, it was wonderful but when I cracked open the book, I found a world of culture and history told in a somewhat fictional way, and it was great.  If you are interested, here is the link: Link to Makeda

This year has been a stretch of strength, soft blows and sudden change. But the rich and bright colors of life have been here with a goal of reincarnating my faith to live organically breezed again. I write this with sisterly affection and intention to just share with you the minutes of my convention. I have a brand new heart and also thankfulness to all those who took the time to read my story.  God bless you!

1 comment:

  1. Great post. Sounds like an interesting book. Would love to find that in my Christmas stocking (hint, hint) ha, ha!